This is me after a really long day of work (edited here: I had to remove the work bitching so I don’t get fired).  By the way, I took the photo from this angle for two reasons (hide the double chin and hide the major roots). I don’t even wanna talk about the limp hair or shiny face, okay?

Do I look like I want to bake a cake? Trey does not eat cake (neither of my kids do, the freaks). But a couple of years ago he was at a friend’s house and the friend had a HoHo cake made for his birthday. Well. I never heard the end of this stupid cake because Trey LOVES crap food. The cheaper the better in his world. He would much rather have a Twinkie over a real cake any day. Twinkies, HoHo’s, etc., He loves them all. Blech. So, of course, he wanted a HoHo cake for his 16th birthday.

Bastard.

Normally I would tell him to go fuck himself, but he’s a good kid and you only turn 16 once so I figure I would give it a shot. I surfed around and it seemed pretty easy and I decided to whip one out. Except when I went to make it at 6:30 at night I realized that I had no chocolate cake mixes in the cupboard. So I decided to really investigate the situation and find a complete homemade HoHo cake. No such a beast.

I found 3 separate recipes. One was for the cake part of it (no links because I didn’t save them – hell, I didn’t even print them – I just propped the MacBook up on the microwave and went to town). It involved a lot of eggs and a very little bit of flour.

Looks kinda rough, huh? I didn’t even bother to follow a recipe for the “filling”. I used Crisco, butter, sugar, vanilla, salt and a cooked cornstarch/milk paste mixture. Then I beat the hell out of it. It tasted pretty fucking good for someone who decided to wing it.

I rolled that bitch up and snapped a picture while holding it because I was in a hurry and was also in the middle of ironing clothes (I am woman, hear me roar!).

So then I made some half-assed chocolate glaze and took a picture of it before it “hardened” like a real HoHo. It was at this point that I realized the half X@nax that I took to help me sleep was kicking in and I had a helluva mess to clean up before I fell into bed.

Voila! A homemade HoHo cake that tastes way more better than the real thing and made a 16 year old happy.

I’m all that and not such a bad mom after all.

I’m outta here.