For the next two days I will be working at my job for approximately 10 hours each day. What does this have to do with anything? Well, it means that I may not be much of a wordy bitch over here because if you have ever worked in an office that deals with health care and the public…YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
FOAM #3 (Food, Outside, Abstract and Myself)
Food is the caramel popcorn that we made yesterday and I took into work today. That stuff is like crack and we all hog it down. And by we I mean my boss and some of my co-workers. There are other co-workers that will not touch anything that I bring in. Rumor has it that it’s because I have cats. Oh, wells. I’m sure this pathetic form of snobbery and stupid assumptions exist everywhere, but it never fails to amuse me. Do you know that back in 1984 when I worked at FBI headquarters there was an issue about a potluck type work dinner because a few white people would be bringing food and everybody knows that white people are dirty? I SHIT YOU NOT. And also, white people hair smells like dog when it is wet. Racism is not just for one group of people you know. Sigh. It all sucks.
Outside is the picture that I took when I left the office tonight. Daylight Savings Time can bite me. I actually thought that maybe I should get myself a little pistol for my purse. I used to have one a long time ago. Eh, fuck it. I would probably shoot myself in the leg or something. Maybe I’ll just bust up and buy some pepper spray or MACE (I’m not sure if it’s legal in Pennsylvania). Go ahead, piss me off. I dare you. Whee! This just reminded me of the one time when I was about in 5th grade and was supposedly cleaning out the cupboard above our stove (translation: nebshitting because I was bored). I came across a can of some wild looking stuff with a bunch of danger warnings all over it. Yes, I could READ (quite well, in fact), but what the fuck did I know of pepper sprays and such? Of course, I sprayed it at my step-brother who just happened to be passing through. What? You never MACED a sibling? Well, you haven’t lived then! He was fine…after going outside, bawling and gagging for a while. Ah, the joys of having working parents.
Anyway, as you can see, I am still struggling with the whole abstract thing. I have no idea what is wrong with my brain. I can point at a painting and tell you if it’s an abstract or not…but take an abstract picture? I don’t think so. I wonder if that’s the part of my brain that hit the floor first when my mother dropped me.
And finally there is Myself. At work. I was at what I fondly call the ghetto office today. The doctor was back with a patient and I took a chance and snapped a photo. Talk about living dangerously! Okay, I really wasn’t living dangerously. If the doctor caught me taking a picture of myself, he would just chalk it up to it being me and my typical weirdness. Heh.
I’m outta here.
Yea for daily posts!
I’m with Amy on this one.
You maced your brother. Hysterical!!
My name as a kid was Annette-you-big-fat-horse-get-off-your-sister. If I had maced her I would NEVER have lived it down. It would have been fun though! Enjoy the daily posts too.
Pet hair is a condiment people.
I have a border collie/ bernese mountain dog cross whose winter coat is coming in- he looks like he’s getting fat, but nope, can still feel ribs, it’s just waves and waves of fur multiplying. Come spring, it’ll be like dog hair tumbleweeds in here- when we took him for his grooming in May, it looked like he lost 25% of his body weight!
Okay, I just spend like 45 min. to an hour looking at all the recipes on one of the food blogs you have on the FOAM site. LOL. Found some really delicious looking recipes. YUM.
Nance, please don’t get a gun. I can just see you with a damned gun in your Vera Bradley bag of doom. Ha.
Shit. You’re probably gonna shoot me now. Heh.
OMG I burst out laughing when I read this post. When I worked at the welfare office back in the 70′s, I was told by some of my black co-workers that white people are nasty because we walk outside without our shoes. I was also told that we aren’t white – we’re actually pink.
One day I walked into the freezing office and my nipples were sticking out under my nylon shirt. One older black woman started screaming at the top of her lungs, “Oh check out whitey, sher’s ready for sex!”
I remember looking at these women and wondering why they hell they were picking on this 20 year old white kid from the ‘burbs.
Can you imagine any of that crap happening in any office situation now?